by Andrew Pacholyk MS L.Ac
It is our right to be a confident and assured person. It is our greatest gift and is often the one thing we find most elusive. Our confidence levels are always changing. Especially when we are out of our comfort zone. We tend to only be aware of our lack of confidence when we are placed in an awkward situation. Here are 10 tips for creating and keeping confidence around for the long haul.
1.Visualization and guided imagery: Picturing yourself as the person who is confident, successful and admired can be a very powerful tool. Energy follows thought. When you program your thoughts to reflect your wishes, you tend to put your energy into making it so. The mind can be the most helpful tool in the way we desire to live our lives and be who we want to be. If you can believe it, you can achieve it.
2. Music: Music is the great motivator. Music empowers our spirit and can give us the confidence to grow, realize who we are and even give us strength when we need it most. Music as a confidence tool is as individual as we are. Find the music that gives you passion. The passion to grow, as a budding flower, into the person you wish to become. Let music inspire you, lift you up and find your voice. Music works on the Entrainment Theory. The beat of the music aligns with our heart and body rhythm. Slower music gives us time for reflection, inspiration and introspection. Faster music moves us, motivates us and pushes us forward. Use music to create more confidence in your life.
3. Positive affirmations: These are words or statements that we say to ourselves and out loud to train the mind into positive thinking. “I am a strong and confident person”. I will walk with my chin up and be proud today”. Saying it out loud, affirms the truth. Saying to a mirror is also a great tool, for it makes us look at ourselves in a re-affirming way.
4. Learning to love yourself more: This is a lesson we can always use and should constantly be working on. Who doesn’t need to love themselves more. Love yourself more by talking to yourself in a positive, self affirming and loving way. Give yourself a confident pat on the back. Treat yourself well by taking care of yourself. Learn that belittling and berating yourself is not only done through words but through our actions, as well.
5. Take care of your physical appearance: When we take care of ourselves, we empower ourselves. Learn how to care for yourself by eating right, exercising, getting good, quality sleep and have meaningful social interactions with others. Get a hair cut, take care of your skin, find a style that you like to dress in and that makes you feel good about yourself.
6. Give a boost to your self esteem: We all need a good kick in our self esteem now and then. It is to be expected. When we are down, the first thing we do is doubt who we are and what we are doing. Self-esteem issues are different in different people. Although you may feel great about yourself in one area of your life, you may be extremely down on yourself in another. Welcome to the world. We can all seek to improve ourselves. It is time you became committed to truly loving and appreciating yourself and who you are.
7. Learn who YOU are: Learning how to love and respect yourself for the unique individual you are, can be the best confidence builder. No two individuals are alike. Cloning to one type of a look, a certain way of thinking or doing what everyone else is doing, will never give you confidence. Only a mask to hide behind. Celebrating our individualism is not only greatly liberating but it is secretly what everyone wishes for. Learn to be yourself and honor who YOU are!
8. Conquer your fears: Fear can hold us back, stop us in our tracts and not allow us to live our lives to the fullest. One of the greatest obstacles in living a fuller more confident life is the fear of failure. The fear of not being good enough. There is no perfection in the world. There is only the ability to reach for and gain the most balance we can achieve at one time. This is all anyone can ask for.
9. Reset your belief system: Lack of confidence is often due to the fact that we have such deeply ingrained conditioning of self hate and loathing that we do not know how to appreciate ourselves or enjoy our lives. By taking a look at our belief system, we can often see what is holding us back, what is creating blocks in moving forward and the reasons behind our lack of love for ourselves. Are you at a cross roads due to the fact that your beliefs are negative, self destructive or evasive? You can change these beliefs.
10. Appreciate the gift of life: Those who truly do not appreciate their lives are missing out on it! We all have problems. We all have situations we would rather not deal with. We all have bad times. By concentrating your thoughts on these negative problems, you run the risk of getting caught up in the swell of down trodding emotions. These thought patterns pull you down like a whirlpool making it even more difficult to get up and get out! Learn to appreciate what you DO have. Be thankful. There are always those who are worse off than you are. When you work from a place of appreciation, it is easier to build a better life from there. Without a doubt, you can gain confidence by loving and accepting the gifts life has afforded you, no matter how small.
“As I change my inner attitudes, my outer experiences begin to mirror the change.”