by Andrew Pacholyk MS, L.Ac
Peacefulmind.com
In Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM), we have a healing methodology called the 5 Phases (Elements).
When Fall is upon us, the air becomes a bit crisper, you can see and smell the changing of the leaves… everything slows down, the days shorten, and harvest is just around the corner.
Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) offers practical advice for adjusting to seasonal changes. One of the basic concepts in TCM is the 5 Element Theory of correspondences. Each element has an associated season, emotion, taste, organ…
The Season of Autumn is associated with the element Metal. The emotional aspect is Grief. The predominant taste is Spicy. The associated and most effected organ in Fall are the Lungs and Large Intestine and the most common external element is Dryness.
The Seasons, Stress, and Colds and Flu
Seasonal change, like any change, can cause stress. The main cause of stress in TCM is Wind. Wind is said to be the “agent of 10,000 diseases,” (The Yellow Emperor’s Classic of Internal Medicine). Wind is understood to be not just the movement of air, but also, any sudden change. TCM has known for thousands of years that stress can cause sickness, and modern research has certainly proved this.
To combat stress, stay in a routine. To avoid colds and flu, keep your immune system up, cover your neck whenever outdoors and stay out of drafts. Wash your hands frequently, eat a balanced diet, get good quality sleep and exercise three times a week.
The Lungs and Large Intestine
In Chinese Medicine, the lungs are an organ system that opens directly to the exterior. It’s function is to regulate and control the breath through inhalation and exhalation. Because of its opening through the nose, the lungs are easily susceptible to cold, heat, dryness, dampness, and most of all, heat and wind. This can effect the biggest organ of the body; the skin. The lung is closely related to the large intestine. The large intestine controls the transformation of digestive wastes from liquid to solid state and transports the solids onwards and outwards. It plays a major role in the balance and purity of bodily fluids and assists the lungs in controlling the skin’s pores and perspiration. It depends on the lungs for movement via the expansion and contraction of the diaphragm, which works like a pump to give impetus to peristalsis by regulating abdominal pressure.
The Solar Plexus Chakra is located below the diaphragm separating the lungs and the large intestine. This energy center is located at greatest nerve ganglia system in our bodies. This center allows for the communication between the upper and lower parts of the body and is connected to almost all the organs. The solar plexus is often where we consider our “gut” feeling to come from. This is also where the connection between the three lower Chakra interchange with the four higher Chakra energy centers.
The Metal Element
The element, Metal is associated with the Fall season and with dryness.
The element is associated with the lungs and large intestines and related to the skin and the nose.
Metal represents our mental activity such as intellect and the ability to reason, memory, thoughts, knowledge and comprehension. Metal governs organization, order, communication, the mind, setting limits, and protecting boundaries. It also rules new beginnings, friendship, clarity, and positive expression. The Metal personality is very good at making decisions and carrying them through.
Emotionally, this element is associated sadness, as metal, like the season itself, represents a withdrawal from life. Reverence is sadness without the loss. This is what makes people cry when they are moved by an experience. A lack of reverence in your life is equivalent to the lack of nourishment from everyday things. The appreciation of each moment in the present, is the virtue of this element in balance.
The Metal element is associated with feng shui and Chinese medicine. The character of metal is “sharp, retracting, polised and finishing.” People with the metal element in their personalities can be well-organized, have strong boundaries, are methodical, principle-oriented, analytical, and are very orderly. Emotionally, metal personalities can appear cold, distant or uninterested. They tend to favor intellect and reason over emotion. Metal out of balance, tends towards worries about the future.
Physically, metal out of balance can manifest as asthma, allergies, colds or flu, constipation, diarrhea or ibs.
The Air Element
The Air signs possess the virtue of knowledge. This does not mean they are more intelligent than anyone else but are generally well rounded and informed. They are good communicators. Most have a good grasp of the language and generally know a little something about everything. They have good personalities and are easy to get to know. Air represents our mental activity such as intellect and the ability to reason, memory, thoughts, knowledge and comprehension. It also rules new beginnings, friendship, clarity, and positive expression. The Air personality is very good at making decisions and carrying them through.
The Air signs are what the philosophers called seers or priests. These are mentally inclined people. They actively acquire knowledge through experience, education and association. In ancient times, the only educated people were priests, royalty or those who took it upon themselves to acquire knowledge (seers).
The Air Signs of the zodiac are Gemini, Libra, and Aquarius and they are the possessors of the virtue of knowledge. They are curious, have initiative, are original, generally are well disciplined and are quick thinkers. The Air signs have a mental nature and are keen witted. They rationalize by thinking things out rather than being influenced by emotional or physical factors.
They enjoy any type of entertainment where they can use their intellectual capacity and their ability to think quickly and accurately often gives them the upper hand. The emotional nature of the Air signs is directed toward self-appraisal. These people have a tendency to judge themselves very harshly.
They have certain standards they set for themselves such as hygiene, the way they dress, education, job performance and family. The Air signs are almost as ego-oriented as the Fire signs. Air signs resort to trickery. These people are crafty, under handed and ingenious when it comes to evil.
They are also prone to physical violence. Whereas the Fire signs’ anger is generally of the moment and soon after forgotten, the Air signs at their worst are mean. They carry a grudge, and like Fire signs, they are quick to express their opinion and are very opinionated. Aquarius and Libra are not as violent as Gemini. Gemini and mind altering drugs such as alcohol just does not mix. The Air signs will not hesitate one moment to express their anger verbally, but physical violence is not a first choice during that anger (the exception being Gemini who will act in an instant).
Air represents the Breath of life! It is an exchange of electrons or flow of energy. Air is the primary nutrient. Survival without it is measured in minutes. It is so important that you do it without thinking. Your breathing is the voice of your spirit. It’s depth, smoothness, sound, and rate reflect your mood. The cosmic breath, the Hindus speak of called prana is also the energetic life force the Chinese refer to as Qi energy.
Air can be a common theme when we dream. It can indicate ideas such as intelligence, being caught up in a whirlwind, tornado or hurricane of confusion or distraction. It can relate to the sacred breath or dreams about flying. You can find out more about air in Andrew’s Dream Dictionary.
The gift of Air is flexibility, and their ability to experience life through many prisms. They’re often excellent communicators, storytellers, interpreters and journalists. They link people together socially, and often have a curiosity that keeps them out and about.
Dryness is a common problem in Autumn. Dryness can manifest as constipation, dry throat, dry skin, dry eyes, dry brittle hair, thirst, and lack of sweat. Most people do not drink enough fluids regularly, let alone in the Autumn. Spicy food can cause or worsen dryness. Be careful not to get stuck in the vicious cycle of craving the same food that makes your symptoms worse!
Grief
As a practitioner of Chinese Medicine and Acupuncture for over 20 years, we tend to see patterns within the cycles of life. For each season there is an emotion that is assigned — for Fall, it is grief. The change of season, the loss of daylight, the falling of leaves, or the cooling temperatures can be triggers that increase this feeling of sadness.
Grief is a normal and natural response to loss. Though we often expect to grieve the death of a family member or friend, many other significant losses can also trigger grief.
Examples include:
*The end of a relationship
*A move to a new community
*A much-anticipated opportunity or life goal is suddenly closed to us
*The death of a pet
Grieving such losses are important because it allows us to ‘free-up’ energy that is bound to the lost person, object, or experience — so that we might re-invest that energy elsewhere. Until we grieve effectively we are likely to find reinvesting difficult; a part of us remains tied to the past. Grieving is not forgetting. Nor is it drowning in tears. Healthy grieving results in an ability to remember the importance of our loss — but with a new-found sense of peace, rather than searing pain.
No two people are likely to experience grief in the same way. The way we think and feel, the way our body functions, and the way we interact with others may all be affected. Some of the more common experiences include:
- Impaired focus and concentration
- Emotional detachment or indifference
- Outbursts of anger directed at various targets
- Self-blame and regret (“If only…”)
- Disrupted sleep patterns
- Decreased interest in food
- Social isolation and withdrawal
- Heightened irritability
- Sudden bouts of sadness triggered by memories
- Emotional numbness
- Feelings of loneliness or disconnection
- Crisis of meaning or purpose in life
Sometimes our reactions are so changeable, intense, or irrational that we fear we may be going crazy. Often grieving people are afraid to confront their grief for fear that if they open the door they will drown in a flood of tears or rage. Though this is very unlikely, allowing others to help us in our grieving is good ‘insurance’ that we can keep our balance. No matter what our intense experiences of grief may be, they are temporary. There IS life after grief — if we acknowledge and work through our reactions, rather than trying to stop them.
Much of the process of healthy grieving appears to be ingrained in our genetics. The act of recognizing and learning from our losses is so fundamental that it often occurs naturally, provided we ease our expectations about how grieving should unfold and relinquish some of our need for control. However, healthy grieving requires active participation; it is a misconception that one simply needs to wait for time to heal. To better grasp the work involved, consider grieving as a set of tasks to accomplish, which may not necessarily occur in a specific order.
Accepting the finality of loss involves acknowledging and expressing the wide range of emotions that accompany it. It requires adjusting to a life without the person, object, or experience that is now gone. Saying goodbye and creating rituals can help facilitate a transition towards finding peace with the loss. Support from close friends, family, or a counselor can be invaluable in this process, though individuals can also take significant steps to assist their own healing. Effective grieving necessitates balance — finding a way to work through grief while managing everyday responsibilities, spending time with others while also taking time for oneself, and seeking support while practicing self-care.
Many people have discovered helpful strategies for navigating their grief. Select the ones that resonate with you, or create your own self-care practices. Keep in mind that grieving is an active journey requiring energy, which may mean stepping back from your regular activities for a time. Show yourself the same kindness, patience, and love that you would offer a dear friend facing a similar experience.
- Allow yourself time to grieve without setting deadlines
- Accept temporary reduced efficiency and consistency
- Postpone major life decisions and new responsibilities
- Discuss your grief and memories with a trusted confidant
- Welcome support and assistance from others
- Prioritize healthy eating and sleeping habits
- Engage in regular, moderate exercise
- Keep a journal to process your thoughts and feelings
- Read books on grief for better understanding
- Plan and enjoy positive experiences without guilt
- Aim for balance in your life, not self-sacrifice
- Carry a meaningful keepsake, letting go when ready
- Communicate your needs to those around you
- Practice self-care through relaxing baths
- Consider seeing a grief counselor
- Get regular massages for stress relief
- Set aside daily time for private reflection
- Choose uplifting entertainment
- Join a grief support group
- Prepare for emotionally challenging days (holidays, anniversaries)
- Engage in prayer or spiritual practices
- Try yoga for mind-body connection
- Explore online grief resources and communities
- Release anger through healthy physical activities
- Seek guidance from religious or spiritual leaders
- Spend time in nature
- Help others as a way of healing
- Document personal growth and lessons learned
The Heartstrings of Grief and Nostalgia
Grief and nostalgia are like two sides of the same coin. When we lose someone or something dear to us, we feel the weight of grief pulling us down. But often, that grief comes hand in hand with nostalgia, which can lift us back to precious memories.
When you’re grieving, nostalgia can surface unexpectedly. Picture this: you hear a song that reminds you of a loved one. The initial joy gives way to the painful memory of their absence. It’s a rollercoaster of emotions. But why does this happen? The connection between grief and nostalgia is complex. When you remember happy moments, the pain of loss can feel sharper, but those memories can also be soothing. They remind us of the love that still exists, even if the person isn’t physically here. It’s like looking at old photos — the smile on your face from a happy memory might be followed by tears of longing.
As time goes on, both grief and nostalgia can evolve. We can actually turn grief into growth. What once felt like a weight can gradually transform into a gentle reminder of love. The tears might dry up, but the memories stay vivid. This is growth — an understanding that while loss is painful, it can also teach us about love, resilience, and connection.
Just like a flower blooming in Spring after a cold winter, our emotions can blossom into something beautiful if we give them the space to grow. Nostalgia becomes a way to cherish love, and grief can turn into meaningful lessons about life.
From a Chinese Medicine perspective, I always recommend to patients experiencing grief to think about bolstering their immune system. This is also essential in any seasonal health regimen. Herbal formulas that fortify the lungs, nourish Qi (vital energy), and hydrate the skin are particularly beneficial. Practitioners might recommend a blend of herbs like astragalus, reishi mushroom, or schisandra berries. Acupuncture sessions targeting key meridians can also help us decompress from our grief and enhance the body’s defensive energy. Additionally, gentle exercises such as Tai Chi or Qigong help circulate energy, blood, and strengthen the body’s natural defenses. As the ancient Chinese proverb suggests, a doctor’s job is not only to help cure the patient, but to show them who they really are — emphasizing the importance of learning more about ourselves in maintaining wellness throughout our lives.
Learn more about seasonal healing and our emotions in Andrew Pacholyk’s bestseller, Lead Us To A Place: your spiritual journey through life’s seasons.
Crystals for Grief
Grieving is important because it allows us to “free-up” energy that is bound to the lost person, object, or experience. This allows us to re-invest that energy elsewhere. Until we grieve effectively we are likely to find reinvesting difficult; a part of us remains tied to the past. Grieving is not forgetting. It is also not drowning in tears. Healthy grieving results in an ability to remember the importance of our loss, but with a new-found sense of peace! Here are helpful crystals for soothing grief:
Amethyst can show us how to let go and trust; surrender so that you may see beyond the cycle that consumes you; give it all up, so that you can receive more. This is the stone of transformation promoting inner peace.
Angelite is especially good for psychological pain associated with loss. Helps us let go of past mistakes, a greater sense of compassion, empathy and forgiveness through grace.
Apache Tear is the stone for dealing with loss and mourning. It helps us to grieve our losses and move forward. This stone restores a sense of balance in your life, promoting protection and forgiveness.
Azurite is referred to as the jewel of wisdom or Stone of Heaven. It helps you release the past and gracefully anticipate and accept the future simultaneously.
Heulandite is a stone used when dealing with a grief and sense of loss. It helps to neutralize distressing thoughts.
Jet has been used to help soothe the pain of both a broken heart due to separation or the loss or death of a relative or loved one.
Kunzite is a powerful, high level stone. It is used against negative energy and empowers positive and loving thoughts. Most effective on the Heart Chakra , it opens the emotional heart and spiritual heart. It represents unconditional lovingness and compassion. Used for healing abuse, loss, addictions. Helps emotional balance, confidence, connection to higher self and oneness.
Smoky Quartz helps to alleviate fear, anxiety and associated emotional depression. It is for those who are grieving and/or dealing with any of life’s big events (birth, death, moving, marriage…)
Tourmaline, Black is a valuable stone for crises and for periods of extreme stress and time of intense difficulty.